Franky G - Hottest Man on the Planet
A Chicago woman cooked up a brilliant plan to get her boyfriend to marry her - she called the police on him! Ana Perez dialed 911 and said that her boyfriend, who was actually trying to break up with her, was ASSAULTING her (Hey - if the sex is good a breakup can be considered assault. Look it up). Ms. Perez hoped that when police arrived, they would convince him not to break up with her - but to MARRY her. Brilliant plan!!!
I'm putting NYC's 8th Precinct on speed-dial right now in order to make my dream wedding happen this year:
Slow down there, cowboy. That's lust talking, not love. Don't you think you should toss your ankles over his shoulders a few times before you decide to actually marry him? You never know. He could be gosh darned pretty yet still be a lousy lay. Then what? Now if you want the police to drag him to your bed for a test drive...
ReplyDeleteI hate having to be the goddamned voice of reason.
Mark -
ReplyDeleteFirst of all, you crack my ass up.
But HOW DARE YOU suggest that my dear, darling, future husband isn't a good lay?!? I mean, did you get a look at him?!? C'mon ... there's not a chance he could be sub-par in that department.
True story: I once passed him on the street in Hell's Kitchen and almost fainted. Seriously. of course, he was with some whore who may or may not be his girlfriend but I COULD JUST TELL she was no good. Just like I can tell that Franky G and I would be eternally happy together. In bed and otherwise.
:)
XOXOXOXOXO
That's some Days of Our Lives drama right there
ReplyDelete