Nowhere To Run To, Baby - Nowhere To Hide

Less than a year ago I was continuing my lifelong habit of avoiding doctors. This was due to a few different factors – such as having little or no health coverage over the years – but mostly it was because of my irrational fear of anything doctor-related, especially needles.

Eight months – and an HIV/AIDS diagnosis – later, life has changed considerably. I no longer have the luxury of avoiding doctors at all costs. In fact, if it wasn’t for doctor visits, I wouldn’t have much of a social life at all.

Recent appointments:

• 10 days ago: Emergency appointment with my doctor due to shingles.
• Yesterday: Visit to Dermatologist to check out a suspicious patch of skin on my back.
• Today: Regular monthly appointment with my doctor for blood work. He will also be assessing my blood pressure (which has been high), and determining whether or not I need medication to lower it.
• 2 weeks from now: Follow-up visit to Dermatologist
• 1 month from now: Regular doctor visit.

None of these are a walk in the park for me – but at least I’m getting used to the idea of being in a doctor’s office without wanting to burst out the door and run for my life.

However, there is ONE appointment – in almost exactly one month – that I’m dreading. On May 23rd I’m finally going to see a dentist.

This is extremely embarrassing to admit, but it’s been 20 years since I sat in a dentist’s chair. Some of this avoidance was due to my previously-discussed phobias, but mostly it was because I haven’t had dental coverage since moving to NYC in the early 90’s.

Luckily (??), the program that pays for my expensive HIV-related medications – NY ADAP (AIDS Drug Assistance Program), will also pay for dental care at certain clinics. And the Callen-Lorde Community Health Center, NYC’s only health care center dedicated to the LGBT/HIV communities, has such a program.

I’ll be honest – my teeth are in bad shape. In fact, I wouldn’t be surprised if they have to pull them all and give me fake choppers. And THAT news, my darling Bunnies, could very well cause me to burst out the doors of the clinic and run for my life…

Two Hundred and Sixty American Dollars

I went back to the doctor today, and he said I definitely don't have pneumonia (YEEEAAAHH!) - but for some reason my lung capacity is equal to that of an asthmatic Octogenarian woman with one lung.  Basically, this means if Carol Channing and I were in a foot race, Ms. Channing would totally smoke me ...

On your mark ... get set ... GO!

I must say, I am grateful to have health insurance - especially since most people who work in the restaurant industry do not.  In fact, I am now the ONLY person with health insurance at my restaurant, which I made sure was put into my contract.

So I'm happy to only have to pay $30 when I visit my doctor.  But unfortunately, instead of just immediately sending me to a Lung Specialist, my doctor is forced to do blood work, heart tests, blah blah blah - because the insurance company won't pay for an expert until my doctor does all the cheap tests first.

The other (major) problem with my insurance is that I have ZERO prescription drug coverage - so I pay retail for everything my doctor prescribes.  This morning when I huffed and puffed my way into CVS and handed my prescription to the Pharmacist, she kindly informed me that it was going to cost $260 (for a one-month supply) - which is more than my total net worth at the moment.

But the Pharmacist did give me some good advice - she told me to go to Advair.com and see what kind of special offers they might have.  And lo and behold, they had a "Get Your First Prescription Free" offer, which I printed out.  When I returned to CVS, my cost for the Advair was exactly $0 - which is well within my budgetary guidelines at the moment.

Thanks to everyone on Twitter who sent me links for prescription assistance and/or lower-cost alternatives.  I go back to the doctor AGAIN on Monday to get test results, etc.

One of these days I hope to be able to beat Carol Channing in the 50-Yard Dash...

UPDATE:  My Doctor's office just called and said they have a bunch of free Symbicort samples that I might be able to use when I run out of Advair.  "Might" my ass - SIGN ME UP!!!  Free Drugs = Awesome.

Back To The Doctor This Morning

You KNOW things are bad if I'm going to the doctor twice in one week.  Considering there was a period of about 10 years when I didn't go to a doctor at all, this is pretty remarkable.

I don't know what's wrong with my lungs/body, but it's starting to make me nervous.  I'll keep you posted.

One more note: I realize I haven't been around Blogland as much as usual, but after work (when I normally blog) all I want to do is sleep.  I was really hoping to figure out the Dish Network at my new apartment so I can watch Top Chef (which premieres tonight).  I was even considering recapping it, but first I need to determine if I'm going to live through the entire season or not.

Not Dead Yet!

I went to the Doctor yesterday for the follow-up visit that I've been putting off for weeks. The same follow-up visit that I thought my doctor was going to tell me I had "Die-A-Beet-Us"...

To refresh your memory, when I made the appointment one of the (idiot) receptionists said "Yeah, you need to come in, 'cause you diabetic". My response: "I AM?!?" - followed by her rushing to get me off the phone.

So I prepared for the worst when I went to see Dr. A. Of course, since I am so terrified by anything that has to do with doctors, I ALWAYS prepare for the worst.

I sat down with Dr. A. and we discussed my test results. We got to the end, and he never mentioned anything about "Die-A-Beet-Us". So I told him what the receptionist said, and he replied, "No, your sugar was just fine". Take THAT, Wilford Brimley!!!

I also had Dr. A. fill out the Customer Assistance paperwork for my très expensive Crazy Pills (Pristiq) - thanks to everyone for the suggestion. Now I have to wait to see if Wyeth approves me - keep your fingers crossed.

Finally, I had an echocardiogram done. This was not a pleasant experience.

First of all, you White Meat Monday fans would have loved the technician who did my echocardiogram. He was this strapping Russian guy with sandy-brown hair and relatively attractive razor-stubble. But, being Russian, he had the bedside manner of a KGB agent with a toothache. And he was wearing two-tone acid-washed jeans under his white lab coat. No. Just NO.

Anywhore, he told me to take my shirt off (which I try not to do - even in the privacy of my own home) and lay on the table on my side - butt facing him. THEN HE TURNED OFF THE LIGHTS. Hell, if I'd have know about THIS, I'd make a doctors appointment every week!

But(t) NO - he leaned up against me and reached around and poked his ultrasound probe all over my chest. It was uncomfortable, and I was covered in jelly when it was over. Which, now that I think about it, could describe some of my earliest sexual encounters. It looked kinda like the picture below, if the skinny guy was a fat guy, and the female technician was a Russian with no personality...


I go back in early December to get the results.

Unbelievable

I went to fill my anti-depressant prescription today (I ran out of free samples), and a month's supply of Pristiq costs almost $140.00 !!! That's over $4.50 per PILL!! It's a brand new drug, so there is no generic version yet - and unfortunately my health insurance doesn't cover prescriptions at all.

I'm going to see my doctor next week about a couple of issues (apparently I am diabetic - FUN!), and we're definitely going to talk about an alternative to Pristiq - $140/month is unsustainable within my current budget.

I Survived The Doctor

As I've said many time - I avoid Doctors at all costs. But recently my Big Ball of Crazy seemed to be getting even bigger - so I knew it was time to make an appointment.

My Doctor (and everybody in the Doctor's office) couldn't have been nicer. I explained to them that I was a PSYCHO BIATCH FROM HELL when it came to visiting Doctors and Dentists. Dr. A. responded: "Dentists? Well that's understandable...".


I explained what's been going on, and Dr. A said that I definitely showed signs of depression, and he prescribed me an anti-depressant. He mentioned that this particular antidepressant wouldn't make me gain weight (thank Jeebus). He also took some blood (I squirmed like a total wuss, natch) and they gave me another appointment to come back in 3 weeks - which I'll do.


One of the concerns I had was of the cost of the drug he prescribed. Well, it turned out they had a display of samples at the front desk (10 weeks worth) - and they gave me the entire display for FREE. Free Drugs = Good!

We will see in the next couple of weeks if I respond to the medication or not. But I must say, I was proud of myself for actually showing up for the appointment. This was definitely a step in the right direction.