This Makes No Sense

I mean, really, who doesn't like BACON?!?

Appointment Day

Yesterday I saw my Therapist, my Nutritionist AND my Psychiatrist...

The good news? I've lost 23 lbs since Thanksgiving.

The bad news? I'm still crazy. And if you don't believe me, just ask my Unicorn.

My First Therapy Session - Today

Today I have my very first therapy session EVER - and I'm a little nervous. The idea of pouring out my heart to a complete stranger seems very weird.

I've been going to the Shrink regularly - but she doesn't really do talk therapy. She does meds and coordinates with my Doc and my Therapist. Basically, She's Head Beeyotch in Charge of my (crazy) Head.

The Therapist, on the other hand, is kind of a mystery to me. Since I've never don't this before, all I have to go by is what I've seen in movies and on TV.

One good thing - it's completely free (unlike my Shrink, which costs me a $75 copay for each visit - ouch). Therapy, on the other had, is done free-of-charge through Gay Men's Health Crisis.

Wish me luck...


UPDATE: Everything went fine XOXOXOXOXO


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Truth

The Freddy Krueger of Cornell

Don't get sleepy - or he'll COME FOR YOU!  Here are the suggested supplementary materials for this professor's class:

• Number 2 pencils
• Calculator with basic accounting functions
• Coffee
• No-doz
• Jolt cola
• Crystal Meth

Last Night on Top Chef: Just Desserts - "Crazy Man Down!"

Did anyone watch Top Chef: Just Desserts last night? It started out with TONS of drama, but then ended with a lame whimper. Some random thoughts ...

• Just when we find out that Batshit Insane Seth Caro has a rockin' body underneath his chef's coat, they go and cover it up with a straightjacket. Not fair! And, like a good Queen, did you notice how Big Gay Zac flirted with a shirtless Seth in the morning, full-knowing the man was clearly insane? Hey ... biceps are biceps, crazy or not.
• Just how deranged do you have to be to be TOO CRAZY FOR REALITY TELEVISION??? Seriously, this is the genre that gave us Wendy Pepper, Omorosa and Jeff Lewis.
• Here's my theory - that mysterious lump in Seth's neck finally moved to his brain - causing him to think everyone was out to steal his beloved paper cups...

• I wonder why they didn't SHOW Seth's freakout, because you know those cameras were rolling. Will they save it for the reunion special?
• Note to self: Watch reunion special - look for lump in Seth's neck.
• I think Gail's Boobies are in a contract dispute with Bravo - they aren't making an appearance until Bravo coughs up more Cross-Your-Heart Bra money.
• What was up with Heather H (below) bitching and moaning after her team WON the challenge?? I've heard of Sore Losers ... but Sore Winners??

• And, finally, how lame was it that Malika (below) just decided to give up and leave? She could have at least had a nervous breakdown about paper cups and grapefruit juice before insanely bolting from the kitchen in a cloud of dementia. Is that too much to ask??

I Finally Saw Top Chef: Just Desserts

Over the weekend I watched one episode of Top Chef: Just Desserts, and it was pretty good. One thing I noticed that they need to change immediately: not enough boobies! When Gail Simmons appears on ANY television show, the producers need to put those knockers on display - front and center!! Why cover up perfection??

And then there is Seth (below). Wow. "Issues" just doesn't even begin to cover it. Seriously, this guy is a few clowns short of a circus, and about as focused as a fart in a hurricane. But you know the producers will keep him around as long as possible - just to see if he kills anyone/himself.

During the episode I spent most of my time cringing while watching Seth teach a Master Class in Insanity, so I didn't really get to know any of the other Dessertestants. But I did notice that Yigit (below) was pretty adorable...

Who else has watched TCJD? Did you likee/no likee? In which episode do you think Seth will take a hostage?? Feel free to discuss in the comments.

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Putting His Diploma To Good Use ??

Legendarily insane Stark County Treasurer candidate Phil Davidson.


Source

PROOF: Republicans are Insane!

Insanity or Crystal Meth?  You decide.  From Gawker:

Stark County, Ohio's GOP picked its nominee for treasurer last night! You knew that, sure, but here's the meeting's highlight anyway: terrifying candidate Phil Davidson screaming, pacing, and half-crying in the most insane stump speech ever. He lost! ...

Glen Beck Has Glamorous Supporters

You will gag when you see all this glamour (pronounced "gla-MOOR") - if not, you'll DEFINITELY gag at the thought of Glenn Beck running for president...

Adam Ant Sent To The Crazy House

I LOVED Adam Ant (above) in high school, so I was saddened to learn that he's become crazier than a sack of rabid weasels.  In fact, Mr. Ant was recently committed to a London mental hospital.  Via Dlisted.

Here is a less insane (???) Adam in his video for Stand and Deliver, one of my childhood jams ...

Honorary (Crazy) Dust Bunny - Annette Edwards

From The Huffington Post:

Great-grandmother Annette Edwards "just loves" dressing up like Jessica Rabbit. "I've always loved...the cartoon character. I just think she's a very sexy cartoon, or woman. With curves in the right places."

The British bunny-lover has spent $16,000 to create her vision.  And, I must say, she looks pretty good...

Crazy ... but good.

Going To The Doctor This Afternoon

How does one explain "batshit insane" to one's Physician?...

My Big Ball Of Crazy

Dearest Dust Bunnies,

I know it’s been a while since I blogged about ME – and this has been purposeful. I have been trying to stay away from the bitching and moaning in an effort to give you a more enjoyable DavidDust experience. No one needs to hear about the Big Ball of Crazy I carry around while living my life.

But a few of you have emailed me to check in – wanting to know how I was doing. One of you even wrote that you liked the “Chubby Talk” (weigh-ins, etc) I used to do. So, for those of you who come to DavidDust strictly for entertainment purposes, you may want to go ahead and skip this post. Warning: SELF-INDULGENT WHINING AHEAD – and plenty of Chubby Talk.

So here it is - my Big Ball of Crazy…

As far as diet and exercise go, I’ve been doing HORRIBLY. I know many of you will say “OK, hit the reset button and get back on track!” – and I know that’s what I should do. But I don't do it – and I'm not sure why.

I actually have no motivation any more to lose weight – I’ve almost given up. So I eat. A lot. Sometimes abusively. And I’ve never been fatter. Motivations like “you’ll be healthier and feel better!” just don’t work for me - especially when stacked up against – “yeah, but a Big Mac would taste SO good and I’m really hungry!”.

I guess what it all boils down to is self-esteem – I have none. When I look in the mirror, I don’t like what I see. Worse, I’m disgusted and ashamed by what I see – no exaggeration. And this influences everything I do and every thought in my head – ALL THE TIME. Furthermore – I am not one of those “I’m Big And Beautiful” people. That would require a level of self-esteem which I do not posses. And these negative feelings I have toward myself only make me want to eat more in an effort to “feel better”. Hello, Vicious Circle? My name is David - pleased to meet you.

My low self-esteem also affects the way I live my life. When I’m not at work I pretty much spend all of my time in my apartment – even on the weekends. And even though I live in Manhattan, I very rarely do anything other than go to work or run errands. I have no social or dating life whatsoever. And honestly, I don’t think at this point I want one – I just don’t feel up to it. When I get invited someplace, I usually don’t go – for fear of being the fattest Ho there. I know this is wrong (and ridiculous), but it is my truth.

You might not understand how I could be this way – but the (good) habits many of you display are equally foreign to ME. I don’t understand how people go to the gym regularly. I just don’t get it. There is absolutely nothing enjoyable about a trip to the gym for me. It’s like torture, and I try to avoid torture at all costs. So when I read about how many of you go to the gym regularly, my reaction is “WTF?”, the same way many of you are reacting right now while reading this. My brain knows that in the long term going to the gym is beneficial. But RIGHT NOW going to the gym will be horrible, and I like to avoid horrible when possible.

Furthermore, I have absolutely no self-control. None. One little slip on my diet, and it’s an excuse to stuff my face all day. Seriously, ONE onion ring on a Friday afternoon can start a weekend-long eating frenzy. And that’s not hypothetical – this has actually happened more than once. And after a binge, I literally have to throw the remaining “bad” food away if I want to get back on track. Because if it’s in my apartment, I will eat it.

I know I should talk to a professional about my Big Ball of Crazy. But I don’t think my insurance covers “insanity”, and I am too chickenshit to enter a doctor’s office anyway. I hate going to the doctor even more than going to the gym – especially when he’s going to bitch and moan about how fat I am. And Overeater’s Anonymous? Out of the question. It’s one thing to blog about my Big Ball of Crazy – but to actually discuss it in front of strangers? I don't think so...

Nothing has motivated me recently to change. Nothing. And I know some of you will leave encouraging and supportive comments, because you care about me. And you know what I’ll think to myself? … I’ll get a little bit angry. Not angry at you, but angry at myself for not sharing your positive feelings toward myself. I know – WTF?!? – bitch is KRAY-ZIE!!!

So, there it is ... my GIGANTIC Ball of Crazy. Aren't you glad you asked?!? :)


UPDATE: A few days after I posted this, I visited my doctor who prescribed me an antidepressant. After just a few days I am feeling SO much better, and my big ball of crazy seems to be getting smaller and smaller...

Like Father, Like Son...

Floyd Bebee and his son Justin were both arrested on separate dates in Florida during the course of one year. As you can see, they are both fond of fun, whimsical, and occasionally White Supremacist tattoos.

In addition to the "Git-R-Dun" tattoo on his forehead, Floyd has "Got-R-Did" inked onto the BACK of his head.

And along with "Psycho" tattooed onto his forehead, Justin has the words "fuck" and "you" tattooed onto his eyelids. See the story from The Smoking Gun here.

Sexy...

White People Are Crazy!

90 Day Jane Not Real - It Was "Art"

From Joe.My.God. Click here for the story.

"90 Day Jane" is one MESSED UP Bitch!

This woman says she's going to kill herself in 90 days - and she's blogging about it. Either she's a lying attention whore, or she's batshit crazy. Check out her blog here.

Suzanne Sugarbaker In The Crazy House!

Delta Burke has been hospitalized for obsessive compulsive and "hoarding" behavior. See the story from People here.