Thanks to Kayce for this (BTW - Dear Kayce: WTF is a tumblr, and why can't I leave a comment? Love, DD):
Will & Grace: Jack's Coffee Monologue:
Hey, friends, lovers, mothers, and other strangers. You’re never going to believe what happened to me. Oh, my gosh! Did you see that? I almost did the half nelson. I almost bruised my delicates, my delicates, my domo arigato Mr. Tomatoes. Huge news! I have met— Are you ready for this? Mr. Right. Well, Mr. Right-Now, anyway. Ba-da-bum! Good night, folks, I’m here all week. Jack 2000! He works over at the Jumpin’ Java. You know that coffee shop on 72nd? And his name is Paul. He is cute with a capital “Q”! And the busier it gets, the hotter he gets. And the hotter he gets, the sweatier he gets. And the sweatier he gets— I forgot where I’m going with this, but the point is… Me likey he, and he likey me. And the best part is— Shazam— he gives me free iced coffee every time I go in, which is every hour on the hour. Thank you very much! And occasionally on the half hour! Bah-da-da-da-da! Blblblbt!