Tuesday, May 31, 2011

Satan's Powder Room


Tomorrow is the 1st of the month, and I'm happy to report that we have a new roommate! But it certainly wasn't easy to find her. 

One of the biggest challenges we had in locating a new cohabitator was the fact that the available room was disgusting. The guy who moved out - let's call him "Jim" - was/is a really nice guy, but calling him a "slob" would be giving him too much credit. I'd call him a "disgusting pig", but I like ham too much to insult pigs like that. Bottom line - Jim is a GROSS DISGUSTING PIG SLOB.

Jim had lived in that room for a year and hadn't cleaned it once - not even a little bit. The private bathroom, which is the room's big selling point, made most Gas Station restrooms look spotless. The sink was completely clogged, the only light was provided by one chandelier bulb salvaged from elsewhere (Jim was too lazy to go buy normal bulbs) and the small space was one of the most disgusting places I'd ever set foot in.

Picture taken AFTER sink and toilet had been wiped down

Just to prove to you how disgusting this guy was/is - Jim AND his girlfriend used this bathroom daily, including-but-not-limited-to brushing their teeth in the clogged sink.


Anywhore, after showing the room/bathroom "as is" to one poor girl (I don't think she'll ever be able to stop the nightmares), I decided to tackle the impossible task of cleaning Satan's Powder Room. But due to my busy schedule this had to happen in 45 minutes one night after work - before a series of people were scheduled to look at the place. But in less than an hour I managed to turn this ...


Into THIS...




All it took was four (count 'em - FOUR!) jugs of Draino, lots and lots of bleach, some crap from the Dollar Store and some leftover red stuff from my Hell's Kitchen bathroom et Voila!, a sanitized and gayed-up baño fit for a new Roomie.

And it worked like a charm.



11 comments:

Bob said...

And the winner of Design Star, Satan's Bathroom Edition is.......
DAVID DUST!!!


Brava!

XOXOXOXOX

behrmark said...

Do you make housecalls? Looks great!

froggy said...

You are a jewel among men!
When Eldest had a lung collapse in college I attacked the communal bathroom in the house he lived in with every chemical known to motherkind. Didn't do the decorative touches...

Kailyn said...

I am so happy I did not accidentally wander into there during my visit. As it is, I am not sure I'll be able to eat today.

Mechadude2001 said...

What? Now that's the definition of some Gay Magic.

Psychomom said...

HOLY SHIT BATMAN! You are the saint of el baño and my dream date, please marry me and be my real househusband from NY.

Por favor,
OXOX

Joy said...

OMG! The horror!! This totally had to be cleaned before anyone would rent that room. Yes, it worked! Looks good now!

nitrox11 said...

Queer Eye For The Rent Paying Flatmate? It's pretty easy to turn trash into treasure if you have the power of gay to help!

Poor, poor Jim.

Miss Ginger Grant said...

What a difference a gay makes!

mistress maddie said...

I agree with kailyn. Thank god I DIDN'T walk in there!!!! You know what a obbessive clean freak I am...I would have passed out and you my dear would have had to get me a fainting sofa and my smelling salts!

Bucko (a.k.a., Ken) said...

Unbelievable, you worked wonders.

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