This was first posted on October 11, 2009 and is being reposted today, in honor of National Coming Out Day...
I was attending Penn State (and was in the closet) in the late 1980's - and I HATED "Coming Out Day". I was having on-the-sly sex with guys - but I only hung out with "straight" people (although a couple of those "straight" guys turned out to be as straight as I was). Hell, I even had a serious girlfriend for a while. So when those brave, openly-gay kids wore their Keith Haring National Coming Out Day T-shirts every October 11, it made me extremely uncomfortable. Especially since I "knew" a few of those kids (cough, cough) - but I didn't want my straight friends to find out.
After college, I moved back home to Central Pennsylvania and came out to everyone except my parents - although they definitely knew. Then, a couple of years after moving back home, I decided to move to NYC - just like hundreds of thousands of young gay people before me. I didn't want to be an actor, or a writer, or a fashion designer - and just wanted to live in NYC and be gay.
It's funny, I think I am probably among the last generations which found it necessary to move to a big city to "be gay". It seems that more and more, due to the internet and increased acceptance, kids don't automatically think they have to move to NYC or San Francisco if they happen to be gay. They can be gay in Allentown or Albany now if they want to. I'm not saying we don't have a long way to go - but you seem to find fewer people moving to cities these days for the reasons I did.
And after I moved to NYC, I finally came out to my parents ... via LETTER. Yes, I totally wussed out. And of course both of my parents were just as wonderful as they could be. But most surprisingly, both of them wrote me return letters which didn't contain the word "Duh!".
So, Happy Coming Out Day everyone! Feel free to share your coming out stories in the comments.
National Coming Out Day is an internationally-observed civil awareness day for coming out and discussion about gay, lesbian, bisexual, and transgender (LGBT) issues. It is observed on October 11 every year - and it began in 1988.
I was attending Penn State (and was in the closet) in the late 1980's - and I HATED "Coming Out Day". I was having on-the-sly sex with guys - but I only hung out with "straight" people (although a couple of those "straight" guys turned out to be as straight as I was). Hell, I even had a serious girlfriend for a while. So when those brave, openly-gay kids wore their Keith Haring National Coming Out Day T-shirts every October 11, it made me extremely uncomfortable. Especially since I "knew" a few of those kids (cough, cough) - but I didn't want my straight friends to find out.
After college, I moved back home to Central Pennsylvania and came out to everyone except my parents - although they definitely knew. Then, a couple of years after moving back home, I decided to move to NYC - just like hundreds of thousands of young gay people before me. I didn't want to be an actor, or a writer, or a fashion designer - and just wanted to live in NYC and be gay.
It's funny, I think I am probably among the last generations which found it necessary to move to a big city to "be gay". It seems that more and more, due to the internet and increased acceptance, kids don't automatically think they have to move to NYC or San Francisco if they happen to be gay. They can be gay in Allentown or Albany now if they want to. I'm not saying we don't have a long way to go - but you seem to find fewer people moving to cities these days for the reasons I did.
And after I moved to NYC, I finally came out to my parents ... via LETTER. Yes, I totally wussed out. And of course both of my parents were just as wonderful as they could be. But most surprisingly, both of them wrote me return letters which didn't contain the word "Duh!".
So, Happy Coming Out Day everyone! Feel free to share your coming out stories in the comments.
1 comment:
No coming out here - but funny story about my brother who *openly* lived with his girlfriend and my grandmother was incensed! "It's just SEX! RAW SEX!" And since I was married, I wondered, did we have 'cooked' sex? Is so, it didn't work well since we had to go to a fertility specialist. I actually got to see the twins before they were conceived - bumps on the ovary via ultra sound. Dr. said go home (drive 4 hours in the dark, Seattle to SE WA) and have sex immediately upon arriving! Twins were born nine months later. :-)
Loves you, loves your mom, your dad and brother and extended family!
xoxoxoxoxo
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