Friday, January 8, 2010

Lost City GOES OFF on Speakerphone D-Bags



O.M.G. - If you HATE people who insist on using speakerphone, then you must read Lost City's expose on speakerphone abusers.  Here's a tidbit...
Speakerphones are rudeness made physical. There's no excuse for them. You are not that busy that you can't pick up the phone. And if you are, hire another assistant, because you must be truly monumental in whatever your business is. No, you're not busy, you're just overly impressed with your many irons in the fire, and decadently slothful. What a feeling of prideful liberty it must be to not talk into a receiver but into the very air, as if the cosmos are awaiting your next command. Talk to the left, talk to the right, up, down, back, front—someone it still listening! My God, what weight your words have. And why shouldn't they? You're a living, breathing, vibrant being with a big office. That other person on the line is just a tinny voice inside a little box! The plebe! The insect!
Read the entire thing HERE.

I HATE speakerphones.  For years I took telephone delivery orders at a restaurant on the fancy-schmancy Upper East Side.  And anytime someone would call me using speakerphone I ALWAYS pretended I couldn't hear them...

Me: "Thank you for calling Sirabella's, how can I help you?"

Woman "preparing dinner" for her family (on speakerphone):  "Yes, I need an order for delivery".

Me (pretending the biatch's speakerphone wasn't working): "Hello? ... Anybody there?!? ... Hello???"

Woman (now YELLING into speakerphone):  "ORDER FOR DELIVERY!!!!!!"

Me"Hello?!? Hello?!?..."

Woman picks up her phone and proceeds with her order.  It worked every time and it was oddly satisfying making people actually pick up the phone.

Does anyone else have a problem with speakerphones?

13 comments:

Daddy Squeeze Me! said...

they have that horrid echo too! if someone puts me on it and then i find they are not listening when i call their names...bitch i gets my pitch fork!!

Miss Ginger Grant said...

Speakerphones were designed for conference calls and group meetings... NOT for individual conversations!

kayce. said...

LMAOOOO ~ they went IN on those speakerphones! and i love your tricks, david! i admit, i am guilty of using speakerphone at home, but only for very long conversations or when my cell is charging. i generally prefer to NOT use speakerphone when possible, though. my pet peeve is bitches who think it's cute to talk on their speakerphone IN PUBLIC, like their lives are so amazing that we all need to hear the details.

Anonymous said...

i loathe them.

when i get a phone call that is obviously on SP, I always ask to be taken off. I won't speak until I am.

I've only ever used SP when I need to look something up quickly on the computer, and even then, I'll ASK if I can...and I return to the receiver ASAP.

Anonymous said...

I don't have problems with people using
speakerphones, I have a problem with the quality of the call made on a sp. It's an evolving technology that one day will have us all tapping our chests and speaking into the air.

Sam said...

I'm with you. speakerphones suck regardless of conference calls and group meetings. Biatch at that busy to make it to a meeting.

behrmark said...

Years and years ago I had to call a colleague at work. She answered obviously using speakerphone. I played dumb. "Is that an echo?" She laughed and said, no she was using speakerphone because she's lazy. I said "I was thinking rude." And she was a higher up and I probably could have gotten fired but couldn't resist. She never used the speakerphone after that.

Marker said...

Thank you David for linking to that article. It's excellent and I could not agree more.

I'm SO using your tactic from now on.

Beth said...

Cannot. Stand. Them. What I hate is that it seems to cut off conversation...like if one person is speaking and the other starts, it cuts off one. I love your tactic. Good for you, because speaker phones are obnoxious! XOXO

Benj said...

I absolutely hate them in personal life, but let me tell you, it's much easier having a meeting with 6 people in one office on speaker, 4 in another (300 miles or 30 miles - no diff) on speaker... instead of the alternate of 10 lines on a conference call, interrupting people every second.

And I use speaker at home when I'm talking to my mom (an hour minimum) BUT no one is home :-)

Wonder Man said...

I hate speakerphones

Ken Riches said...

Only use the speaker phone if I have someone in my office that needs to be part of the converstation. Otherwise, pick up the damn phone :o)

Joy said...

Great way to deal with them, DD!! And love Behr's remark! I agree with Miss Ginger about when they should be used.

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