Thursday, June 11, 2009

David's Big Adventure


I am NOT one of those spur-of-the-moment people. I'm just not. In order to get me to do anything these days, you have to submit a request in writing ... in triplicate ... complete with proposed plans, maps, diagrams, cost analysis and alternate routes in case of emergency. I am a Virgo - I like planning.

So I was surprised yesterday after work when I said to myself ... "Self, we're gonna take the train out to New Jersey and get us some Arby's!". "Self" thought that was a great idea, since he likes Arby's just as much as I do.

Here in NYC we have the normal subway, which will take you all over Manhattan, the Bronx, Brooklyn and Queens for $2.00 per trip. But there are also the PATH trains which run underneath the Hudson River between Manhattan and New Jersey - and it's actually cheaper than taking the regular subway (it's only $1.75). Since there is a PATH station right near my job on Christopher Street - I decided I would take the PATH one stop to Newport/Pavonia. I saw on the Arby's website that the Arby's in the Newport Centre Mall was the absolute closest location to me, in terms of distance.

So I hit the PATH - which I had never done in my 16 years living in NYC...



It was so quick and easy!! It took me less than 10 minutes to get to Newport/Pavonia, which was lovely...



I knew that the mall was "across the street" from the PATH station, and sure enough I saw this sign. "Passageway" sounds so MYSTERIOUS!...


After going through the "passageway", I entered the mall. The signs said the Food Court was on the 3rd floor - so I hit the escalators. I was practically running at this point, I could almost hear the roast beef calling my name...


I rushed off the escalator and into the Food Court, and there it was ... the Promised Land. Arby's - at long last! Angels sang, Fairies danced, and Unicorns farted curly fries and rainbow sparkles as I approached the counter. I was home...


Arby's was the busiest restaurant in the Food Court (natch), so I had to wait to get my food. In fact, while I waited I decided to also get some roast beef "to go" - that way I'd have something to nibble on while I watched Top Chef Masters later that evening. Here is the "before" shot of my tray, with the brown bag being my "to go" treat...


And here is my tray after I attacked it. Notice the brown "to go" back is empty. That food didn't stand a chance...


I though about going to the counter and getting MORE, but then my "Fat Shame" kicked in and I didn't do it. I could have gone back up there and mumbled something about "getting something for my roommate" (I've done it before - it's a Fatty thing), but at this point I was stuffed to the gills and quite happy. So I jumped back on the PATH and returned to Christopher Street - and then rode the subway home.


Unfortunately, now I know it's actually quicker to get to Arby's than it is to go home after work. My "diet" doesn't stand a chance. BURP! Excuse me...

27 comments:

RAD said...

what a fun adventure for you and now for us to follow along..he he...I love me some Arbys too! :-)

C'est moi, c'est moi Lola said...

Oh, for the love of Arby's....

You must like a lot of sauce, 'cause those were a lot of napkins in that 'after' shot!

It reminds me of a friend in the Peace Corps who was a fan of Chick-fil-A. He tried in vain to explain to the rest of us of the joys of Chick-fil-A, and had his fiancee bring over 2 sandwiches with her when she came to visit us in-country. Those sandwiches had a flight time of over 20 hours, and he ate them anyway. The things people do for comfort food....

Can't wait to see your post on TC: Masters since I missed it last night.

You know, it's a good thing you don't crave 'The Boobies' like you do Arby's. Poor Gail would have to slap a restraining order on you in order to protect her girls!

Anonymous said...

I just love your story and am happy you found an Arby's when you just have to scratch that itch!!!

Have a happy day....

LB anon

the dogs' mother said...

Never stand between a boy and his Arby's!

sflewie said...

You crack me up! I LOVE reading you blog and do so religiously every day.

sflewie

Timmy said...

I am so happy for you!

mikeinbama said...

I truly love your fasination and dedication to Arby's. I have an Arby's at the enterance to my neighborhood. I think about you everytime I drive past it.

Anonymous said...

Oh Lord, I adore you. NO ONE makes me laugh like you do!

Totally with you on the planning thing. Drives my single friends crazy, but I gotta lay shit out before I jump in.

And Arby's...yummmmm.

Tivo Mom said...

Finally! Just so you know I will be this way in July driving up I95 heading for South Carolina and the first Bojangles sighting. I was talking the other day about people who don't eat when they are stressed or depressed. I hate those people.

Angel said...

ahhhh, that looks like a Giant Roast beef there Tranny....same as I get! and yes, I eat that whole thing....what in the hell do they DO to that roast beef to make it taste so good? Dang! My mouth is watering just thinking about it!

I'm so glad you finally got you some arb's.....but it could be a very bad thing that it was so easy to get to....uh oh! ;)

Love you, love your hair!!!

kokoskitten said...

America's Roast Beef, Yes Sir! I love arby's like yourself, but more in spirit than actuality. Ive been vegetarian for 15years, but if i went back for day, it'd be roast beef sammies til i puke. i love when my man eats a roast beef so i can try to make out with him all sloppy-like. don't forget the jamocha shakes!

Kailyn said...

I'm all for planning but sometimes you've got to wing it.

And I think it's very dangerous that Arby's is now so convenient for you. Sounds easier to get to than Queens.

Dwight Supremacy said...

I resemble this post. :) ... Glad you got to take some hot beef to the face! ;)

Unknown said...

So you finally made it to Shangra La! I didn't know that's where curly fries came from. Hilarious!

Valerie said...

Thank heavens you got some Arby's! I too crave me some Arby's now and then, and it's true that nothing comes close to Arby's! Might I suggest the poppers with the bronco berry sauce. YUM!!! Also, I think the people at Arby's headquarters like playing sick jokes, because Arbys restaurants are always in the most impossible places to get a car in and out of the drive. Good for you David!! Now I'm thinking Arbys, there goes my diet! Must be contagious! Take care!

Bob said...

In Buddhism they always talk about the Path, and I think it's somewhat ordained that "The Path" takes you to Arby's!


XOXOXOXO

Mark in DE said...

Funny story! Now that you know you can get your Arby's on when you need to, you can make that an occasionl 'reward'. The key is not to go so often they memorize your order!

Kwana said...

I'm laughing my butt off thinking off all the detours I've done for food. You are a man after my own heart. At least you didn't go back and there was a workout involved in getting to Arby's. It's all driving in Westchester. Ugh.

behrmark said...

You know David, if you ever decide to come visit me in Southern California (Whittier, hometown to Richard M. Nixon - bleh), it is a less than 5 minute from my house to the closest Arby's - AND they have a drive-through!

The only difference is our Unicorns don't fart curly fries and colored sprinkles. Could you live with that?

LOVE the adventure. You're my hero. BEHR HUGS!

Unknown said...

mmmmm...Beef and Cheddar... mmmmm

Mistress Maddie said...

Well God damn it! Now if I can't reach you on your cell phone, I now know to call the Arby's at the Newport Towncentre!

Beth said...

What an adventure! I'm so glad you were able to get your crave on. (My personal fave at Arby's is the Beef 'n Cheddar, with so much Arby's sauce that it drips out...yummm.) I'm surprised you still didn't get some to go, so you could have it for lunch today! XOXO Beth

Ken Riches said...

Jiminy Christmas, two days in a row! I now have a kleenex next to the computer to wipe off the spittle :o)

I noticed there were no sprinkles on your currly fries, what happened?

JNez said...

hah! glad you got your arby's fix man. do they still have that 3 for $5 beef & cheddar promotion? i can eat all three. hmmm...i'm going to have to head to newport center mall this weekend for some

Unknown said...

What a great discovery. Once one gets into NYC it is sooooo hard to get out.

Wonder Man said...

love Arby's

theminx said...

Naughty boy! LOL

xoxoxoxoxo

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